Wednesday, January 23, 2013


I stood in line at the store and let my eyes blur. For once, I was happy the line was long cause for the first time today I could relax. Out of the corner of my eye I saw something fly by. I focused my eyes and saw a bird staring at me. I nodded to him, I mean what else could I do, an he yelled at me. I jumped and yelled back "Hey! What do you want?!" and he just stared at me, along with everyone else in the store. Suddenly the line seemed endless and I wanted to get away from the little dude with the staring problem. Birds are kinda creepy and I wasn't all that sure it didn't want to hurt me. So I decided I no longer needed my few groceries and I left the basket with the cashier, lied and said I forgot my wallet and took off, small bird in tow.

I kept looking back and he hoped and flew behind me keeping up. I started to jog and he took flight landing in front of the door. I stopped and we stared at each other. Too light to cause it to automatically open I put one foot forward, stepped down, and the door opened.

The bird hopped out and stopped. I walked out behind him and he looked at the sky like he couldn't believe it was real. He looked at me, and yelled again. I smiled and he yelled one more time at me, shook and then took off. I found myself wishing I at least asked his name.

It made me think of my dad and I don't know why. It started in my heart before my mind even thought it an when it hit my head, I started to cry. I realized I'm gonna have a lot of these moments when something happens that makes me think it's my dad. I don't know if it's really him or the giant loss still inside of me that just makes everything about him, but it's the way it is. I'm gonna have these moments when I'm knocked off my feet and I cry and feel and know that there is more to all of this (there has to be) and it makes me believe.

And for that, I am so fucking grateful.

"the breaking of so great a thing, should make a greater crack."

- William Shakespeare

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